August 13, 2006
Review Corner
Public service time: Do not rent or purchase “C.S.A.”
I had my concerns but I love counterfactuals. I consider them a lively way to learn history's consequences as well as facts. I highly recommend the What If? books. They give insightful and intelligent commentary on how different the world could look with a small change of historical facts.
Last week's review corner included British actor Stephen Fry, who has also written some very good books. One, Making History, is a counterfactual of sorts where a young Physicist uses time travel to prevent Adolf Hitler's birth. This book, like What If, has some nuance. Actions have reactions and the removal of one figure does not supersede the unfairness at Versailles or economic forces of post-Weimar Germany.
"C.S.A" displays exactly zero nuance. Like good counterfactuals, it exploits a tipping point. Washington almost lost a huge percentage of Continental forces at Brooklyn. If not for fog and quick thinking, the war could have been lost early. Fry's setup is a little more far-fetched, but his is a novel. The Confederacy was close to bringing in Europe on her side, and in this mock-British-documentary, that is exactly what happened. Grant surrendered to Lee. Lincoln flees to Canada (using the Underground Railway) and dies in relative obscurity. So far, so good...
Most of the film is then devoted to the idea of a modern slave-owning and drawl-speaking continental power. Chattel slavery of Africans was so good, it was spread to include Asians on the west coast, and a caste system in Latin America. The Ken Burns style look at the War is interrupted by commercials for "The Shackle" to keep your property in line, "Black Sambo" racing oil, and a sequence of minstrel spots for restaurants and foodstuffs.
There is a great line in "The Simpsons." Apu is applying for U.S. Citizenship. During an oral history exam, he is asked " What was the cause of the Civil War?" He responds, "Actually, there were numerous causes. Aside from the obvious schism between the abolitionists and the anti-abolitionists, there were economic factors, both domestic and inter--" He is interrupted: "Wait, wait... just say slavery" and he confirms: "Slavery it is, sir."
I wouldn't call myself a Southern sympathizer. Most of my kin dressed in Gray and I am very glad they lost. Slavery outweighed any beneficent aspects of their cause. Yet I am aggravated when people cannot see any other factors. It's lazy thought.
And lazy thought carries on for two hours here. One star. Skip it.